Monday, June 15, 2015

Why pregnancy really isn't that bad :)

{Jessica, Where have you been the past week?} 

Oh, you know me, just busy busy...ok, actually not. I am kinda tired these days.  Nate tells me I'm making a baby or something, so its ok to be tired. I am basically BFF with my lazy boy, since it is electric and sits me up with the push of a button 

{oh good! I thought you went out of the country or something trying to evade this dreaded time of the last few weeks of pregnancy}

Actually, its not that bad. I know, I am the *complainer of the year* when it comes to talking about pregnancy, but I have been very blessed by the Lord that I am not in a horrible state about this pregnancy right now. Oh yes, if you had asked me anytime in the past 8.5 months, I would have told you that I was ready to be done and that its just so hard. But last week this amazing "blah" or numb emotional feeling came over me and I don't really care that i am pregnant right now.

{no way! like, you are fine being pregnant forever??}
haha...no! I just mean that I am not frustrated like I thought I would be. I thought i would be an emotional wreck and not able to stand the last few weeks of this pregnancy, but the Lord is amazing and knew I needed this. 

He also knew I needed a sweetheart like this


and some fun dates like this:
#rockiesgame
side note: as I was walking in last week, this police officer asked if "i should be walking in my condition" then the concessions man asked my "baby would like some peanuts" lol   the comments some people make

Anyway, back to the Lord knowing things that make my heart happy:
and more fun dates to the movies 

and more laughs and smiles from my son
(seriously, aren't children heaven sent?? this pregnancy has been so much easier because Eli makes me smile all day long! he is soooo cute!)

{wow, so pregnancy isn't all bad, eh?}
Heck no! I might make it seem that way, but really here are the good parts of being pregnant:

1) feeling a baby kick is the sweetest thing
2) you get to eat what ever you want and no one can tell you you're eating too much 
3) I never feel alone, its like i have someone with me all the time
4) I know he is safe inside of me. Once he comes out I'm all stressed about if he's eating enough or breathing while sleeping or put in his car seat right...but right now, he's totally fine and safe :)
5) Anytime I lift something or walk somewhere, i feel like a super hero because everyone is like "oh, you shouldnt be doing that."  but I'm like, "well, you know me, able to do hard things all the time, even if its lift this 5 lb table that everyone thinks is too heavy for me" lol
6) Here is a much more spiritual one, but I feel very close to the Savior. I know I am not doing anything nearly as important or as big of a scale as His Atonement, but I am able to sacrifice my life for someone else's life directly. One on one. It makes me feel very close to Him. I am able to get a closer glimpse of the love Heavenly Father has for His children because I love these little spirits that I get to sacrifice and spend time with sooooo much it makes my heart want to burst!

{thanks for sharing, its good to know you're not just a cranky preg-jess all the time}
Well, I try not to be. Heck, I made like 5 jokes last night and nate might have laughed at 4 of them! I am pretty darn enjoyable when I want to be :)
And I try to be nice, and not share all my woes with people who havent been pregnant before, otherwise they get really scared lol

{well, what now? you are 9 days away from your due date, and Eli was 9 days early, right?}
Yes....yes.
Now I just wait. My calendar is open. My to-do lists are done. 
I kinda just want to lie down for a while, but I already did that for a few hours today, so I probably should do something else, eh?
I know that just sitting here and wishing it to be over is not the right thing to do...so i will be strong. I will move forward and endure to the end hopefully happily :)

That's my invite to y'all
Whatever trial you are going through right now. Sit down and make a list of why it is actually not that hard, or why it is a blessing. Then realize ways you can endure to the end and not just "get through it." Then post it somewhere.

It will help!
promise!
Good luck

Hopefully, I will have this baby tonight and not see you for a while, cuz who has time for bloggin when they have a newborn to coo over #andfeed #andgetsomesleep 


Monday, June 8, 2015

The Storm before the Storm

Remember how my life was totally out of control last week?

I mean, besides the crazy pregnancy horomones:

I found bugs in my bed multiple times! #eek #worstthingever
My A/C wasn't working
Our car broke down #stuckathome
A trail of ants found Eli's food stash under his high chair #maybeishouldmop??
No one on craigslist would return my phonecall
All the good deals at dealerships were taken a few hours before we called
i was stuck at home with no way of shopping or playing with friends

Seriously. I was kinda going crazy last week
I don't even remember what happened. 
Yesterday at church, I got the oh-so-common-8-month-pregnant-question: "How are you feeling?"

Seriously, like a month ago, no one asked me that. But even men that I never talk to stop and ask me. I must have a big sign on me that says: I am super pregnant and need to be asked how I am feeling, not doing...but feeling. 
#ormaybesomeonesentoutanemail

Anyway, normally when I answer that question I say "Good." but in my mind I am thinking "if you only knew that my hips hurt so bad I want to go into a coma until the baby comes, I can't sleep, my legs cramp anytime I even think about moving, my depression is a rollercoaster, and my son's favorite activity is to either body slam my belly or run away from me in parking lots....How am I feeling? Like I wish I had this baby a few months ago. Thanks for asking."

But this week I didn't even think that because I guess I was so busy looking up cars online {for-like-ever} that I forgot that I am annoyed of being pregnant still

Here is the good news. 

Monday:
 Car broke down

Tuesday:
 AC in our apartment was finally fixed
we sold our car 
(which we deemed to be totalled...seriously, it was a mess and not worth more that $200 to fix...we actually made quite a profit haha. You can read about our ghetto car here)

Wed: 
look at craigslist all day
look up every car i find on kellybluebook to find out its actual value
look up reviews on certain types of cars
look up if the car will fit two car seats and big pregnant lady and a tall husband
call and email a million people

Thursday:
continue crazy looking and calling
have only one person return your phone call
ok, one more person returned the call. we set up an appt for early the next morning

friday:
wake up super early to go test drive a car, and realize too late that he had texted to cancel it because he was going camping
(seriously, does anyone actually want to sell their car on craigslist?? if so, answer your phone and let us test drive it!)
cranky mom for getting too little of sleep
test drive another car that is too small for us
continue looking online
call and go to multiple car dealerships for cars that we want and the cars were sold before we could get there #badluck

Saturday:
wake up and find good deals
(more kelly blue book and reviews...we are pro at this now)
make an appt, get down there. 
test drive a car/get it checked at a mechanic
make an offer on it 15 mins before the next person comes in to look at it
(seriously, this car was a good deal. he had 3 other people scheduled to test drive it that day and more people called while we were signing the paperwork!!)

so we bought this car:
2003 Honda Accord with 83,000 miles on it
It drives amazing and feels really new! We are so excited

*********************

Wow.
I seriously don't want to think about cars anymore
but I am now sucked into it, and I look at the make and model of all the cars we pass and think about how it was rated online or what the kbb would be.

*****************

So today. I actually went to the store
since I now have a car to drive :)
and we bought tons of stuff because we were soooo out of food and stuff from me dedicating my life to finding a car before this baby came.

#sidenote
yes, we were in a hurry to buy a car. I mean, anyone that told me that I should just calm down and take my time, and wait a few weeks...NO WAY! Seriously, everything that went on last week should not happen once you have a newborn. It was life consuming. Plus getting emissions and registering your car here also takes forever....so i knew we had to buy a car before the baby came. So we are very grateful that despite no one answering our calls and many deals being taken before we got there, that we still found a good car that we are super happy with :)

************
so after my 2 hour target waddling trip
seriously, it took way too long for me to get to each corner of target today. I am surprised no one asked if i wanted one of those electric carts.

anyway, so after my 2 hour trip and bringing it in from the car...I am going to waddle to my bed and wait for eli to wake up

#happyresting!!!



Tuesday, June 2, 2015

Something is out to get me!!!!

So, I don't believe in fate or omens or karma.
I also think one shouldn't complain all the time
--key word, *think*...i might still complain, but i dont think i should--

but
there is something out to get me! Seriously!

So, when I was pregnant with Eli, I was sick almost the whole time. Guess what made my sickness worse? 

being hot!

guess who lived in provo in one of the hottest summers on record  while pregnant?

me!


guess what didnt work in my apt or car?
my AC!!

Seriously!
We had to have a window unit installed in our apartment for me to even survive!
I didn't go outside unless i had to between 8 am and 6 pm

when I did, and i had to drive my car I wanted to die. The AC would randomly stop working. Like all the time. I even shared the car with my brother-in-law that summer and he said it always worked for him

see...something is out to get me!

THEN!

the next summer, same car, not pregnant, the AC worked all summer in both my car and apartment.

THEN!

this summer, pregnant....AC not working in my car or apartment again!

seriously!!!!!!

like, i had to trade cars with nate and make him drive our ghetto car 20 miles to work, when that car's limit is like 21 miles, only because i couldn't stand the heat (plus poor eli was always so sweaty, especially since the back windows had to be screwed shut!)

and we have run the AC straight for the past few days and its still a constant 75 degrees! it might have cooled down to 72 or 73 last night, but probably not, I just sleep with a fan on me all the time now.

#proof


#dontworry   I am haunting maintenance until they fix it, since they've been over twice in the past month and not done so.
#lovehaterelationshipwithmaintenance



So, this morning Eli and I went to the gym...they must not have the AC working in there either because by the end of my workout i was dripping sweat everywhere. Which is not a normal 8 month pregnant lady type of workout for me. (These days I go to the gym just to make me feel better :) i guess, haha)
#8monthbelly #yesiwearsliponshoestothegym #icantreachmytoesthesedays

So, i am basically going to sit here at my apartment dying of heat until this baby comes. Then maybe maintenance will come fix my AC around the time the baby is here.
#praythey'llcomesooner!!!

Nate said it must just be something that I have to go through during pregnancy since the intense heat only comes on and the AC stops working only while I'm prego


haha

well, to make all of you feel better about my situation
this is the beautiful view we get when we cross the street to look at the "horsie" and "cow" everyday

colorado really is beautiful! and the mountains...well, you can't see them in this picture, but they are breathtaking! so panoramic!

have a good day!
and make sure to enjoy your AC for me!!!!


************************

update

this is the next day.
I didn't post the above post because.....our car broke down :(

yep, it finally went on us. Luckily nate was the one driving it, and I wasnt stuck in the heat and then the rain and then in the sweaty passenger seat of the tow truck.

so besides that, the other worse news is that...
things are getting hot in here!
look!

78 degrees!!!!! in my house!!!!!!!
like, "don't touch me! don't look at me! don't even think hot thoughts!" 
The AC has been on non-stop for 3 days, and the temp is only rising.

And now after meddling with the gage, I messed it up and it won't change its "target" temperature, and i turned and yelled...well, loudly said "oh no!!!! we are going to die!" and Eli started crying. 
So after consoling him and telling him we were not going to die

this happened


This is Eli crying because he wants me to turn the fan off. He stands in front of it and cries and doesn't move but just points and says "off--off".   
Its cute and sad at the same time.



So, what are we doing to stay cool?
well, all my blinds are shut
the lights are off
the fan is staying on (sorry Eli)
and I am not doing laundry
even though i should, because my favorite,...ok, only prego yoga pants are dirty
So, I am in some old BYU-I shorts and a shirt that gives my lower belly a draft (at least that part of me is cool...haha, no visitors please.)

We have no where to escape to because i don't have a car

So, if you know of anyone who goes around sabotaging pregnant women, can you please call the cops on them??? this isn't very fun 

hopefully tomorrow there will be better news!




Wednesday, May 27, 2015

"can't-make-up-my-mind" syndrome

Have you ever had complete "can't make up your mind" syndrome?

Well, I am officially 8 months (36 weeks) pregnant now!
(I was so excited to get to this point! I mean, being pregnant you can use pregnancy as an excuse, but no one...I mean no one...messes with an 8 month pregnant lady. So i have officially reached this awesome status of "don't you dare make fun of my waddle...I'm 8 months pregnant!")

anyway,
 I had this crazy energy last week and got all my "get-done-before-the-baby-comes-or-else" to-do list items done.
Nursery...done!
Baby clothes....washed!
Hospital bags...packed!
witch hazel and depends....bought!
#okdontactlikeyoudidntusethem #weallknowhowpostpartumis

 Now I am just kinda twiddling my fingers, waiting for this baby to come, since all my friends I usually hang out with are out of town, moved away, or sick.

My emotions are all over the place and kinda contradictory right now
Some days...ok, lets go with...some hours/minutes/seconds I'm kinda like:

"wow, I am so tired, I really wish I could just be put in a coma 
and told to wake up when my baby is here"
next minute
"Running a half marathon sounds really awesome right now."
#ireallyhavethesethoughts #crazyright?

Sometimes:
"I am so sick of eating and getting insta-bloated, I wish I didn't have to eat food...ever."
next minute
"I want to eat everything in this house, and now I will."

Sometimes...well, more like ever since this weekend:
"Hooray, I'm glad our friends left their amazing-1000-calories-per-bite lemon bundt cake at our place after they came and played games with us Saturday night."
next minute
"why do I keep eating this cake that makes me feel like a sugar-high zombie? I am going to turn into a walking cake!"

while Eli is asleep:
"I feel great, I won't take a nap, Ill just watch netflix for hours"
once he's awake
"why couldn't you take longer than a 3 hr nap? I wanted to sleep or at least get things done."


I hope this never happens to you. It is driving me cah-ray-zeeeee!    And I know nate is going crazy too, although he won't say anything about it #perksofhavingawonderfulhusband
Except that I can't decide on the baby's name!!!!
Seriously! Boy names are really rough!
We had a million girl names we were in love with #oklikefour
but then once we found out it was a boy, we were like "um...cool. what are we going to name him?"

So, nate really likes to call the baby a name, not just "baby." So, i give him the top name of the week to call our baby. But then, it rubs me the wrong way once and we switch names. We've gone through our top 3-4 names like ten times. I finally told him that I can't decide til we meet the sweet little baby and then we can decide between Mustang and Eugene
#jk #notournamechoices #butwouldntMustangMarchantbelegit??

PLUS
 I still think we are having a girl!!!

Here's the story. We went to the ultra sound doctor and he had this old equipment. I was like....ok, i hope you can tell whats going on in there? His first shot he was like "oh this is an obvious one!"...and we were like, really? 
So, he did the rest of the ultra sound checking the other organs and I literally said:
"um...can you show us the boy part again, just to make sure?" 
He didnt think that was funny that I was challenging his 90 year old machine. 
But I guess the baby turned and he couldn't find it again. 

So we're stuck with this "obvious" picture he gave us :)



So, we tell people we are 80% sure its a boy. If it comes out a girl, then we have some awesome names for her :) 

Can you see why I am an emotional wreck over this name thing?? I don't even know the gender, but a lone what to call him/her.

Well, I'm off to do...something.
Maybe clean, maybe make cookies
maybe read, maybe eat
maybe sky-dive or maybe i'll just paint my nails

I can't decide. I need to get a hobby...wait, if I get a hobby started, it will stop once this baby comes...so maybe I shouldn't...or maybe I should

ahhhhh
til next time!

Tuesday, May 26, 2015

Gluten Free --Part III

My post today is to answer a lot of questions. 

A lot of people want to know more about my experience. 
A lot of other people want to know if and how to go gluten free. So I have combined it all into this post. (although I believe in NAET and body talk and how it helped me, I also realize that there are a lot of people that just need to go gluten free and since I went through all the pain of figuring this stuff out on my own, I thought I would share the information with ya'll so maybe it would make someone's transition much easier) 

Enjoy!


Answering questions:
So, a lot of people have asked me questions after hearing my story of overcoming celiac disease (if you missed the other posts, this is where you can find part I and part II) . Here are some of the main questions asked and their answers:


{why did it work?}
You know...I don't know exactly why. I do believe that energy has a lot to do with the way we all work. The way things were created and run. It has a lot to do with our moods and the way we think and feel. It has to do with how we interact with others
(check this out to see how energy can be seen in formation of ice crystals when speaking positive or negatively to them)
I think its a neat way to find out what is wrong. Without modern medicine, how did people do it back 2000 years ago? It could quite possibly be through energy!

{you referred to the body talk specialist saying that she resolved past conflict/trauma that happened. What caused this? Do we all have this? Why couldn't you remember the incident if it was so specific?}
Well, I am not sure how this all works. The body talk practitioner just said that I had been holding onto a memory that was deeply embedded that was causing all this turmoil down to even the cells of my body. But she also did say that my colon problems were caused by trying to have control, and it wasn't related to a specific event. (and that most people who try to have a lot of control also have colon/digestive problems). I don't know why I can't remember the memory she was referring to, but I am sure that a life time of those memories would def build up and cause me to live differently, and that by that different way of thinking and living that it would cause me to have different energy. I guess that energy just affected me more than I thought. 
There are lots of ancient medicines that believe you have energy pathways, and if the energy gets stuck somewhere then it causes a lot of problems. Chinese medicine works a lot with it, and they use this medicine widely over there today. 
Yes, i think to some degree all of us have these energy blockages. Now, does it affect everyone the same? i don't know. Why do some incidents cause people to have severe Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome, and the same thing doesnt really affect someone else? I don't know. but that explains it..kinda

{Why do you think that there is such a widespread problem of people not "accepting" specifically gluten these days?}
This is a tricky one. I do have a strong opinion on this. I have much experience that shows that there are a lot of us 30 and under that are having intense problems. I rarely encounter someone who has the problem who is over 30 (albeit, it does happen), but it is booming in our generation. It also seems to happen to a lot of people when they turn about 18.

My theory is that something dramatic happened about 25 years ago that affected all of us as children. and that it takes about 10 years to get bad enough to show. (that is why we are all about 18-30 that its affecting). It could be through genetic modifications of our food that occured 25 years ago or a strain of antibiotics that came out then.

I know that genetically modified food is not the enemy, and that it has saved thousands and millions of lives. Here is an article on it. So, I will not protest it. I personally just think that it is linked to it. But I also think that antibiotics are a common cause of gut problems. Doctors prescribe them way too readily these days. So as of right now I feed my family organic non-GMO wheat as much as i can, and stay away from antibiotics if I can. 

{Do you think your symptoms will come back?}
this is a tricky one. I def think they could come back because whatever caused me to have the problem in the first place is still out there. Since I don't know exaclty what it is, then it could come back. and yes, I would first go to a NAET dr and a body talk practitioner to try and fix the problem. The money is way way way worth feeling better. Plus, we save tons of money not having to eat gf right now. 

{do you have to keep going back to those doctors?}
I asked that over and over again to the doctors because I was scared I couldn't be  fixed. They kept telling me that only a few people ever come back after they are "healed." And a few of them just to get tune ups or fix other allergies they have developed. So i don't feel like i'll have to go in for tune ups, but if I do. I don't mind spending a few hundred every few years to feel good :)

{how did you even get courage to do that?}
I was so sick.
Let's restate it.
I was so so sick.
I was willing to try anything. Plus a few testimonials sure helped. I always say that if you are not willing to try these things, you are not sick enough then. Because we had no money. Like no money, but we budgeted and spent around $1500-$2000 on all the treatments before we were done to help me be healed. So money wasn't a barrier, it was just...what was I willing to try to feel better?

{would I recommend these treatments for people who were not as sick as you were?}
yes. I think that in our world of processed foods, chemicals, antibiotics, pollution, etc that so many "unnatural" things are affecting us that most of us have problems that could be resolved  through NAET and body talk. I also think a lot of us live with problems that we don't realize are heavily affecting us, but once they are resolved we realize how much of a burden they were. (like headaches, low blood sugar, mild depression, pains, difficulty sleeping, etc). So I would recommend everyone going in and doing it to see how your life can be improved!
Sessions cost anywhere from $40-$100 depending on the experience of the practitioner.

{well, my doctor says I have IBS and so I'm sticking with that.}
Yes, you probably do have IBS. I had IBS! but I feel like IBS is a way to say "something makes you sick and we don't know what or how to help you."  So you can live like that, like I did for years, or you can move forward with going gluten free or going to one of these practitioners to see if you could overcome that problem, and feel better. 

{do you feel like everyone with gluten sensitivity or celiac disease will be healed by going to said doctors?}
I want to say yes. I would recommend everyone with these problems to go. But sadly, I don't think it will be 100% success rate. Just like NAET couldnt totally help me (it helped me overcome my seasonal allergies and sugar/nut problems.) but it couldnt figure out gluten. So, i think if you search long enough, you could find something that would work. But I also feel that most people could benefit from NAET or body talk just like I did. I would def try them first!!!

Here are questions people ask me about going gluten free:
How do I know if I should go gluten free??

Symptoms:
Here is a list of the typical symptoms that gluten could be causing
Here is another list of things that are most commonly seen
the trick is that it does different things to most people. So, the lists vary all over the place!
My symptoms were things that I never would have thought were connected to eating gluten, so I was treating them all individually, and when I went gf, and a lot of them resolved or went away and would come back when i was forced to eat gluten for the tests and such, then it was crazy to realize how gluten was affecting my body!

I had: bloating, alternating constipation and diarrhea, extreme tiredness/fatigue, high anxiety, constant need to eat (always felt like I was fasting, my arms would shake, but I was always bloated and full...it was weird), canker sores, receding gum lines/sensitive gums/enamel loss, depression/extreme mood swings, weight fluctuation (like 8 lbs difference day to day), weight gain, nausea, and more. 

Seriously, it was way worth it to not eat gluten for me. But like I always say, if you are not willing to go gluten free to see if it will make you feel better, then you must not be feeling bad enough. 

Why would I want to go gluten free??

Intense problems it could be causing:
So, there are a lot of other things that eating gluten can cause problems with.
Why?
Because it has to do with your digestive system and that has a lot to do with your hormones. Seriously, I could tell that my hormones were so much more regulated when I went totally gf. That's why if you are having a problem with Autism, Depression, Anxiety, Infertility, Arthritis, Headaches/migraines, Insomnia, Extreme Fatigue/Tiredness, or other things that doctors can't figure out what is causing the problem. I would say look into this. Try one of the options below to find out if gluten is causing you problems.

What are tests that can be done to know if I need to be going gf?
Well there are a few options. 
1) go gluten free (like completely gluten free for 3-6 weeks, directions below) and see what difference it makes, or see what it feels like to add back in gluten
2) get tested
there are different tests you can do. Almost all of them require you to be eating gluten during the test, so if you are eventually going to do these tests I would recommend doing it before you go gluten free. The only thing about these tests is that many people might come back negative (stating that gluten is not the problem, BUT i know lots of people that the tests were negative but living gf makes them feel so much better. So they are not totally trustworthy, but they are helpful.)
You can get a blood test done
Get an endoscopy
Gene testing
(these 3 tests are explained here, talk with your doctor about what would be best for you)

3) Go to a NAET practitioner who can "test" you to see what foods are making you sick/causing different symptoms or long term problems.  (I would recommend this just because they are able to do things much faster and much easier than all the blood work that only tells you if your body is rejecting gluten, but can't do anything about it. But what if you are also rejecting corn and milk? NAET helps there!)  --for more info about NAET check out my other blog post about it here

Ok, I realize I am ready to go gf, how should I do it?
It is important to do this right, you have to go completely gluten free to see a difference! Even a small bite of bread can throw this whole thing off!
the first time i didnt go totally gf so i couldnt tell a difference!
 The second time I went completely (like no sacrament no toast in a normal toaster), it worked much better! but even then it wasnt night and day, but i felt 50% better after 3 weeks, then after a few months i felt 80% better. And when i ate gluten again it wasnt immediately like "wow, that stuff hurts me." it takes my system 12-24 hrs to react and start giving me pains and such.

You have to cut out all things with gluten:
anything with wheat, barley, rye, or oats (unless the oats say gf)

If you are like dying because the gf bread tastes bad then, you might have to cut it out for a few weeks and then add gf bread back in.  i have seen studies that show that if you take something out of your diet for about 3 weeks (like normal bread for example) then bring it back in another way (like starting to eat gf bread) then you cant tell the difference as much as if you immediately switched over.  So if you  hate gf pasta or crackers or bread, give it 2-3 weeks and see if you like it later.

Here are two options for your food lists: 

1- buy expensive gluten free food, so you can continue eating the same meals as before (ie sub gf pasta in your casseroles, use gf bread, etc)
2- try to eat what you normally eat that is gluten free (ie only cook meals you are used to that are already gf)

let me explain the difference. if you go with #1, then you can still have your pasta casseroles and such, but use gf pasta and gf cream of chicken soup, or you can use gf bread or flour to make pancakes or french toast. Two problems with this: your family might not like the gf stuff (nate doesnt mind it, but since it is so much more expensive, if we have pasta, i make 2 different kinds of pasta and just make sure not to contaminate my gf pasta with the spoon that is used in his pasta)...BUT with casseroles, that is hard, so if i make lasagna, we just use gf pasta and nate says he cant tell the difference.
 second problem with just switching things out for gf stuff is that it tastes weird.

if you go with #2 then you might go crazy only eating the few things that are in your original diet that are gluten free. (like salad, chips and salsa, and rice).  So your choice :)


Here are some links to help make the transition easier:
Here is a link to cleaning out your kitchen if you are dedicated to getting gluten out of your life!
Here is a link to a fun website that will help you see how "probable" that things are gluten free (this is a link to gummy bears...but I used this website to help me find out things that I could be getting contaminated with that didn't have the information on the package.)

I am still sick even with gf, what else could be causing the problem?
this is a super tricky question, because everyone is different, 
BUT common things that I researched are:
-oats, carageenan (they put this in things to make it creamier 
like sour cream, icecream, soymilk), msg, carmel coloring
-really, it could be anything.  I would first try taking out gluten and milk. This is most common, soy next, then corn. (really it is difficult to tell, that is why I like NAET practitioners that can tell you what things your body is rejecting.)
-It also might be a problem with low probiotic growth in your gut, 
so you could try taking probiotics and prebiotics
-It might also be an enzyme that is not working for you, there are different supplements that have enzymes that help you break down gluten, I never went this route, but had freinds that did and it worked for them. Talk with your doctor about this one, I guess :)

GF tastes weird, what are some good meals and brands that you recommend?

Here is a great link to help with eating out GF (since you know you'll be out and about and others will want to go places other than Costa Vida or Chick-fil-A)
gfoverflow.com is wonderful to find out which brand of things are gf

here are some meal ideas for you:

{Breakfast} 
Cereal: the only cereals that are gf are the ones in the gf section or Chex (not even off brand chex are gf ) and sometimes rice krispies make gf cereal, but the only gf ones have a HUGE sign on the box saying gf (normal ones arent gf bc they use malted barley in the rice crispies so its not gf)
oatmeal: oats are not technically glutinous but they usually share land with wheat and are severely contaminated, so you can buy gf oats and gf granola (but watch out for normal granola bars that have oats in them, even though the allergy statements do not say: contains wheat/gluten, it still is not gf unless specified gf oats are used)
toast: use gf bread, but dont use your normal toaster, just broil it in the oven and make sure to have your own butter that is not contaminated with bread crumbs (this is important with all spreadable things. I just have my own drawer in the fridge with my own pb, jam, butter, mayo, ect and own shelf in the cupboard, plus i label everything gf so i know its my peanut butter)
 cottage cheese is ok

{Snacks} 
crackers: glutino crackers are pretty good, or nut thins
yogurt: most yoplait is ok, but still make sure it says gluten free on the package because i have gotten home with some that arent ok (just a side note, youll find that some brands always label gf, but some brands are gf but dont label it, and some only label the allergens...thats why i use gfoverflow to find out what brands are ok)
veggies: salads are good, just check out the dressing on gfoverflow first
 chips & salsa: check out the salsa, sometimes they add wheat as thinning agents, so check on gfoverflow for brands

{Lunch}
pasta: if you decide to use gf pasta i like the corn pastas, but you can try the rice ones, sometimes they get mushy though
Sandwiches: this is tricky because it depends on what type of bread you use. usually bread tastes better toasted or put in the microwave, then i do open-faced because it is too dry to have a top and bottom peice of bread. also make sure the meat is gf, sometimes with turkey and hams and such they add broth that is not gf

{Dinner}
pancakes and french toast, obviously use your own flour or bread, but make sure to cook yours first and not use the same pan or flipper if you have touched the normal bread.

{Desserts}
chocolate (most chocolate is ok, just watch out if it is processed on equipment that processes wheat)
 pastries: this is hard to find gluten free. try some cookies though. udi's cookies are good and betty crocker gf mixes are good too. so go ahead and buy the gf cookie, brownie and cake mixes (they are way easier then buying gf flour and substituting because then you have to add xanthum gum and it almost never turns out the same, but the mixes have the other ingredients altered to make it taste pretty good :))  I don't like "Bob's Red Mill" mixes because they use chickpea flour, its healthier but tastes kinda gross.

Here is picture of our "meals ideas" list that I had when we ate gf:
it might be different than you are used to because I also don't like eating meat, cheese, or creamy stuff. But at least there are some ideas :)




Other things I love that are gf (I would still eat these today!)
Honey Nut Chex
Whenever Bars (ok, this is good because its sugar free and gf)
Rice Cakes/crackers (quaker brand, nabisco, or targets "simply delicious" brand are all good)
Snyders GF Pretzels

Places that have good gf sections:
All of sprouts and whole foods! great labels!
target just got a small gf section and so did walmart
smiths/king soopers always labeled it nicely



I hope you have enjoyed my journey of going gluten free and then going un-gluten free :)
let me know if you have any questions!

good luck on your journey ahead no matter it be gf or not!

Thursday, May 21, 2015

Fighting Depression Naturally

Life is wonderful.
Life is also very hard.
We all go through good and bad days.

Its hardest when the bad days are more frequent than the good days. 
Or good days seem to never come.
This is how it feels with depression.

I have never been one to admit things such as this throughout my life, because I always wanted to seem "perfect" and like things were going really well, like I had life figured out. I thought {don't judge} that only weak people had depression. That if they just tried a little harder to be happy, then they wouldn't be depressed. or that it was brought on by some sin. 

One day, my whole perspective changed. Elder Holland gave this talk in General Conference for the LDS church about depression and expressed how real it is. How normal happy, righteous people can get depressed and it doesnt mean they are sinful or bad people. It happens to the best of us.


My whole perspective changed. Its funny to think back to that time, because I was depressed at that point, but didn't know it. haha, good thing nate and I talked about it and came to the conclusion that depression is not a scary or sinful thing, that it is something to be faced. It is something to acknowledge and deal with. 

When I had my sweet baby, I remember everyone asking me how I was feeling. It was like..."um...good?" Postpartum depression (PPD) is something so weird, and as a new mom I was just waiting to see if it would hit me or not. I remember telling people "well, I feel way better than when I was pregnant." That's when I realized I had been depressed my whole pregnancy. It wasn't just that I was at home sick all the time that made me feel so lowsy, it was a real chemical (or might I say hormonal) thing, it was not just in my mind. 

So since I felt so good not being pregnant, how could I possibly have PPD?  Once again, not until I was out of it did I realize that I had PPD. It took a lot of extreme anxiety and insomnia to get me through his first 5-6 months of his life. I just thought mommy life was hard and overwhelming, but I know now that once again, I had a chemical (or hormonal) change that caused a type of depression. This one was much more difficult to realize since my symptoms didn't come in the same way as most people describe "depression." So, judge or don't judge, but I had it, and never want to go through that again. 

Those experiences were hard. I don't wish to relive them. Its hard to tell them, but I know that someone else out there is going to learn from my experience, and maybe, just maybe, be able to help themselves more than I did, and avoid going through that pain by what I am saying today.

That is why I talk about it so openly.
That is why I am writing.


Ok, so what are we to do? 
Just sit around and say, if I am pregnant or have PPD I am bound to be depressed? 
If I have seasonal depression (SAD), when its snowing, I will just sit around and be sad? 
Mom life is hard, and I am going to eat my way through it since I don't have family around or good friends.
NO! 

{important note}
Also, not just "clinically depressed" people can benefit from this. i feel like just by being a stay at home mom and not having a lot of adult interaction can cause sadness that these things can alleviate!

There are so many natural ways to fight depression/sadness/loneliness!

One super hard thing about depression or deep sadness is that its like a downward cyclone. 
You feel depressed
so you don't feel motivated to do things that will help you
so you feel more depressed 
you do more things that are bad for you (cookie dough anyone?) 
and dont do things that help you 
and this causes you to be more depressed.

So, if you are reading this, and know you need help. You have to start trying things. You have to make a plan with someone who can support and keep you motivated. It will start an upward motion to your feelings and that will help you reverse the bad cyclone of depression! Before I got pregnant again, I made a plan with my husband. And through the past 8 months, its been hard exercising daily, reading my scriptures, getting to social activities, just going outside daily...BUT the plan has helped sooooo much!!!


*******************
So....here are some things i've found that have changed everything

Once upon a time about 2 years ago, I heard a leader describe 5 things you must do to stay out of the hole of depression, and I am soooo  glad that I remembered them! They've saved my bacon so many times!

1)get out of bed/make your bed=committing you are not going back to bed
2)read your scriptures (even if you have to have scriptures by your toilet and read one verse, do it!)
3) open your blinds
4) get outside once a day at least
5)laugh at least once a day

I would add:
6) exercise (natures natural "high")
7) eat healthy (sugar and white flour only make things worse)
8) Try to talk with someone else once a day face to face (besides your spouse)...find a friend you can stop by/call when you need social interaction
9) serve

Ok, so these might sound easy. And sound kinda pathetic. I mean, only laugh once a day or go outside for a few minutes??? Let me tell you. I struggled so hard my first pregnancy to do all of these every day. I can't logically explain why i couldnt open my blinds, but it just didn't happen. And getting outside for 5 mins a day was such a struggle. 
So, this is real!



Anyway. 
Some people really do need medications. And thats ok. 
I am here to say that we should be trying all we can to alleviate it naturally first, or during.

If I find out anyone is depressed, first! first! first! thing I would say is to exercise 30 mins a day. Get your heart rate up! It is the natural "anti depressant" Heavently Father has given us. I can't tell you how many studies show that exercise works just as well or better than a lot of depression medicine! Plus, it makes you look better too!

*****************
here are some other things I have found very helpful:

Vitamin D!
Some people just don't absorb it like others do, and so you either need more time in the sun or take supplements.

Taking doTERRA vitamins changed everything for me!!!! Like tremendous, miraculous change!
You can find out more about those here: http://www.mydoterra.com/jessicamarchant/#/
or email me at jessica.hawkes21@gmail.com for any questions
There are also a lot of doTERRA oils that really help. My daily go-to to help with my mood/energy/motivation is a doTERRA blend called Citrus Bliss!

postpartum help:
Postpartum Progress is a wonderful website with many many tools!
You can also do Placenta Encapsulation, sounds strange but it helps so many people!
hire a nanny to come a few hours a day to help with children or house chores


************
here are some other things that I have found to help.

Finding spiritual quotes and posting them around the house will bring the motivation and "pick me up" that you need ;)
Here are a few:

{All Things Bright and Beautiful ~ President Monson}

"Happiness does not spring from perfection but from applying divine principles, even in small steps."
-President Dieter F. Uchtdorf, October 2012 General Conference


Everyday Mormon Women: An Attitude of Gratitude

****************
ok, here is an awesome one. This is an article found on the church website, but the research sited in here is all done by non-religious researchers. 

Here is the article. I recommend everyone  reading it. It is just so amazing! After reading it, I applied a lot of the principles like adding music back into my life and "trying to be happy." It made a big difference!


And the following is the list of things they say that research has found to make some people happier than others:

1.       Happy people surround themselves with other happy people. Joy is contagious. People are four times more likely to be happy in the future with happy people around them.
2.       Happy people try to be happy. When happy people don’t feel happy, they cultivate a happy thought and smile about it.
3.       Happy people spend money more on others than they spend on themselves. Givers experience what scientists call the “helper’s high.”
4.       Happy people have deep in-person conversations. Sitting down to talk about what makes a person tick is a good practice for feeling good about life.
5.       Happy people use laughter as a medicine. A good old-fashioned chuckle releases lots of good neurotransmitters. A study showed that children on average laugh 300 times a day versus adults who laugh 15 times a day.
6.       Happy people use the power of music. Researchers found that music can match the anxiety-reducing effects of massage therapy.
7.       Happy people exercise and eat a healthful diet. Eating a poor diet can contribute to depression.
8.       Happy people take the time to unplug and go outside. Uninterrupted screen time brings on depression and anxiety.
9.       Happy people get enough sleep. When people run low on sleep, they are prone to feel a lack of clarity, bad moods, and poor judgment.
10.   Happy people are spiritual.


I hope you feel better! I hope that you can understand others who are struggling better!
I hope that the sun comes out daily in your life, but if it doesn't that these things can help make at least some stars come out!

We are all in this together. 
Struggling is not a sign of weakness or sin. 
But giving up is not an option!
#herestobetterdaysahead

Tuesday, May 19, 2015

When the couch is better than the bed....

here's going to be a #herestobeingreal and #realmomlife post :)

I have a love hate relationship with these posts. I love posting them, because I love helping other moms know that their lives are not that different than mine. I like being real so that there is at least one blog out there that you don't have to feel bad when you are done reading it, you can know you woke up looking better than i did :)

But I also hate it, because I put myself out there #yaknow? Its kinda scary, because I come across as not a perfect person. I share that I struggle with pregnancy related depression, I eat too much junk food while pregnant, I share many un-attractive photos. 

But in the end, I do it anyway because I love helping others ;)

Anyway

So, today. I woke up in the worst mood. 
I slept horrible last night. 
My hip problem has been feeling "better" over the past month and I have been loving it. I don't have to be dropped off at the door for everything. I can actually take Eli to a park and walk around behind him. I can walk the halls of church without wanting to cry.

But yesterday, the tides changed.
As I went to bed, getting into bed hurt sooooo bad. Then every time i had to roll over to get out of bed I felt like i wanted to die. Like worse pain than ever before. Then i couldn't go back to sleep because of the pain, and I'd have to get up again to go to the bathroom. I think I made record amounts of trips last night, with the worst pain every time. I am surprised I didn't cry, or at least wake nate to help me out of bed each time 

I think I am going to sleep in my mom lazy chair tonight.
#yesthelazyboynategotforgraduation #iconvincedhimtogetitforme #specificallyforpregnancy #andlatenightnursingsessions
#whatanicehusband



it looks so comfy, right?
this way I wont have to sit up. it is electric, so ill just have it sit me up
#lazyorgenius?

Anyway. So besides having a freak out moment that I was paralyzed when I woke up this morning because I couldnt walk for 10 mins, the rest of my day consisted of:
#warning
#momlifecomingup


having a crying child open the shower curtain a million times because he didn't like his favorite toy now that mom was in the shower

have the pediatrician's office tell me that Eli is behind on 4 shots because our last pediatrician didn't keep records right
#lotsofcrying

not being able to walk around my house

wash all my newborn stuff (like clothes, burp cloths, blankets, nursing tanks, etc)

almost suffocate because the dryer has a problem that the maintenance doesnt think is a problem 

(you are supposed to be seeing the complete fog on the windows and the drips coming from the top)

BUT

I got a lot done!


on the left is my new consolidated "do before baby comes or you will go crazy" to-do list 
on the right is the pages of lists I have been living from trying frantically to get things done in the 2 hours I have energy to do things each day while eli sleeps :)


I used to be a list person.
it ran and ruined my life
I gave up on them 2 years ago, but my pregnancy brain this time has made me resort to writing them again otherwise I am lost on what I should do besides eat and change Eli's diapers

so I am excited that my list is so much shorter :)
#onlyonemonthleft


Anyway
Besides all the #momlife stuff I just shared
I actually got all my newborn stuff washed and put away and packed my hospital bag and resolved things with my insurance today :)

#sidenote
you guys, look at what socks I found in the big bag of socks my mom gave me that I never went through with Eli
#overwhelmedmuch

but look at them, they are for baby's with kankles!
I couldn't stop laughing! why are the tops bigger than the bottom?
#sorryifyouhaveakanklechild #illsendthemtoyou

anyway

hooray for me getting all that done, right?

so it was that kind of day
hopefully tomorrow goes better
#hopefullyicanwalk #hopefullyiwillgooutstide
#iwillalwayssmilethough

Good luck with your day!
don't follow my example and live by to-do lists
life is about the people you love
#butsometimesthingsgottagetdone